satyricom - Recently Updated Pages

Satyricom International's Wiki Home Page

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 23:18:55 CST

Welcome to the Satyricom® International Wiki (A Satyricom Global Concern).

Here you can find out everything you need to know about Satyricom International and it's subsidiaries.

At Satyricom were in the people business - we know what you want as consumers and citizens, why? Because we invented it! That's right, as we speak your life is being made simpler, your job is taking less time, and your children are growing up healthier because of products made by Satyricom.

We know what people want deep down inside, in the farthest reaches of their soul - that's why we make it. Because we know buying isn't just about wanting - it's about needing.

Please visit us at our new home, Satyricompedia!

Ask The Doctor

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 11:58:10 CDT

Welcome to Ask The Doctor, Satyricom International's attempt to improve customer relations with the buying public. CEO, Dr. Ignatius M. Skinny will randomly select an emailed question to answer. No question is too complicated for this mighty brain and resident know it all. Check back frequently and see if your question has been answered.

-Satyricom Customer Relations Dept.

Fredric Wertham Funnies

Contrabandwidth — Tue, 07 Aug 2007 11:54:53 CDT

(Any resembelanceto the work of the great Jay Kinney, is merely coincidental. Our apologies and respect.)

LoMax Recordings

Contrabandwidth — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 15:43:43 CDT

It started with wax cylinder juke boxes lit by gas light. LoMax jukes became known in the industry as the "LoMax Candlebox". Not to be undone by a minor setback such as failure, an older, slightly wiser Otto von Dünnmager learned how to "convince" recording artists into selling him the recording and publishing rights of their recordings. Soon an entire industry was born, with von Dünnmager at the helm of what would be one of the biggest American culture markets ever.

SatyriComics

Contrabandwidth — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 15:42:53 CDT

Corrupting America's Youth Since 1952!

It began simply enough. A young Dr. Skinny perused a comic book rack at a drug store, paying particular interest an ad promising "...eager to please" Artemia salina that could be "trained." Having worked with Artemia salina while studying marine biology at the University, his young scientific mind could not help but bubble at the thought of a more compliant Artemia salina. Sadly the experiments were inconclusive, due to Artemia salinas ingrained domestic tendencies, they tend to stay around the castle and occasionally drink too much beer and curse at sports on television. But, in the true spirit of American Ingenuity, Dr. Skinny looked back over the comic book in which he had ordered Artemia salina from, and saw the vast opportunities offered for selling Satyricom brand products in comics, and thus SatyriComics was born!

As a new found comic publishing magnate, Dr. Skinny set out to get the word out about Satyricom's® vast array of products in between the doodles and frames of the comics he published. Thus began one of the most eclectic mix of titles and genres of comics ever formulated. Each title aimed at specific market groups, and had pages of ads filled with fine Satyricom® branded products . From the mad cap adventures of Harriet Homemaker in "Domessticy" to the pomp and piety of the pulpit in "Sacramenial Stories" - one might say there wasn't a person in the country that didn't have a SatyriComic to read!

...

Titles

Frederick Wertham Funnies - Seducing Innocence since 1954!

Satyricom - A History

Contrabandwidth — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 15:31:04 CDT

Satyricom hasn't always been the mom and pop multi national operation registered with the World Trade Organization that you see it as today.

1864 - The von Dünnmager Vitality Tonic for Rheumatism, Dyspepsia, Whooping Cough & St. Vitus' Dance, Dandruff & Gout.

Satyricom's® humble beginnings started when the country pushed felt the need to push west. Founded by ambitious German imigrant, Otto von Dünnmager, a traveling entrepreneur and importer of shéyóu. Upon having his business shut down by the authorities over a dispute of local protection laws, Von Dünnmager took his business across the country in search of towns with more accommodating business laws. This was shortly before the completion of the Transcontinental Railroad in 1869, a revolution that would have made Von Dünnmager's journey much easier trek. Instead he crossed the country with a burrow named Francis and a pull cart full of bottles (Francis later worked her way up to middle management, retiring with a nice pension).

The West was still wild in those days and not the place for a lone business man on the open prairie. It is said that von Dünnmager took the company of a former railroad worker/vagabond Chinamen who taught him everything he could about making shéyóu, himself. The pioneer business man that Otto was knew that a name like "snake oil" wouldn't go over in Topeka, and changed the name of his personal formula to Otto von Dünnmager's Vitality Tonic For Rheumatism, Dyspepsia, Whooping Cough, St. Vitus Dance, Dandruff, & Gout , a name that would just roll off the tongue, and create a branded sense of certainty within every American.

1866 - A country torn apart is sewn back together ...with von Dünnmager's patented combination cotton gin and industrial loom!

Another von Dünnmager early vision was inspired by seeing ragged soldiers return home to the newly devastated south. von Dünnmager had the idea of an all in one fix to the south's financial whoas. Seeing as the labor pool had been forever altered, von Dünnmager saw that possibility strengthening industry in the southern states, where simple farms could become factory farms - with the proper von Dümagger branded equipment. von Dünnmager's motives were strictly financial, no matter what the side effects would be. Otto had another vision - to create factory farms that would establish an industrial strong south and incite another succession(a south in which he could sell von Dünnmager branded munitions to). Though this vision was short lived when von Dünnmager's eyes were soon diverted towards the political arena. Otto's began his foray into politics by financially supporting a number of candidates in local and national elections, soon learning that affecting business interests through politics was a much more lucrative way of stretching his industrial reach.

This Historical account is continually updated as the facts are unearthed from the archives of Satyricom® International.

...

Today - Satyricom Global Concern

A Pinnacle of Manufacturing Know How, Corporate Think, and Market Savvy Hoo-Haa.

Today the Von Dünmagger vision lives on with Otto's great great great grandson, Dr. Ignatius M. Skinny PHD, D. Eng, D.H.Sc, S. Arch, D.P.E, Esq.

Satyricom Subsidiaries

Contrabandwidth — Sat, 23 Jun 2007 12:43:29 CDT

Welcome to the Satyricom Subsidiaries page. Here you'll find a list of the companies flying under the Satyricom banner of quality! Click the appropriate subsidiary for more information.

Publishing:

SatyriComics

Music and Entertainment:

LoMax Recordings

Investment:

Satyricom International Finance

Satyricom Finacial

Satyricom Properties
- Satyricom Residential
- Satyricom Corporate

Retail and Dining

Restaurants

- Johnny's on the Spot
- Goldburgers

Retail

Products - a list of products carrying the Satyricom Label

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:10:27 CDT

Otto von Dünnmager's Vitality Tonic For Rheumatism, Whooping Cough, St. Vitus' Dance, Dandruff, & Gout	Type your photo caption or credit here.	Type your photo caption or credit here.
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Links Page

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:04:16 CDT

Inter - Company Links for your Wellness and Self Esteem

Satyricom Global Concern Web Log - Updated frequently for all news related to Satyricom® International (a Satyricom Global Concern).

Associates of Satyricom Int.

DadRock - A good blog on parenting from a stay at home dad.

Human Resources

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:59:02 CDT

Dr. Ignatius M. Skinny, CEO, PHD, D. Eng, D.H.Sc, S. Arch, D.P.E, Esq.	Type your photo caption or credit here.	Type your photo caption or credit here.
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News

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:35:02 CDT

Satyricom Unveils New Look For New Fiscal Year!

Satyricom has unveiled a new look for a new year. Please visit our blog for more details.

Satyricom Properties

Contrabandwidth — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 12:04:54 CDT

There is no abstract available for this page revision.

Passive Aggressive Fantasies

Contrabandwidth — Mon, 04 Jun 2007 14:14:55 CDT

There is no abstract available for this page revision.

satyricom - Recently Updated Pages

Satyricom International's Wiki Home Page

Ask The Doctor

Fredric Wertham Funnies

LoMax Recordings

SatyriComics

Frederick Wertham Funnies - Seducing Innocence since 1954!

Satyricom - A History

1864 - The von Dünnmager Vitality Tonic for Rheumatism, Dyspepsia, Whooping Cough & St. Vitus' Dance, Dandruff & Gout.

1866 - A country torn apart is sewn back together ...with von Dünnmager's patented combination cotton gin and industrial loom!

Today - Satyricom Global Concern

A Pinnacle of Manufacturing Know How, Corporate Think, and Market Savvy Hoo-Haa.

Satyricom Subsidiaries

Publishing:

SatyriComics

Music and Entertainment:

Investment:

Satyricom International Finance

Satyricom Finacial

Retail and Dining

Restaurants

Retail

Products - a list of products carrying the Satyricom Label

Links Page

Human Resources

News

Satyricom Unveils New Look For New Fiscal Year!

Satyricom Properties

Passive Aggressive Fantasies